[For Derek]
Nov. 8th, 2015 10:14 pmI don't know why I kept going back to the cabin. Maybe there's some sliver of hope still in me that he'll show back up like nothing has happened. I mean, some people have been gone and have come back, right? Maybe this is only temporary.
It's been over a week, though, and Derek still hasn't returned. That first day I went over after not hearing from him for a couple days, I sort of broke into his cabin. Sort of. It didn't sound like he was home, but I could hear Jinx crying inside, and that alone freaked me out. I managed to get into the cabin through a window, and it looked like he hadn't been there for a couple of days.
That put a fucking damper on my Halloween, let me tell you.
After three days of returning each evening to feed Jinx and Puff, I finally just brought them back home with me. I hated trekking out there, getting my hopes up along the way, just to have them crushed again. Whenever Derek came back, he could come and get them from me.
That's what I figured, anyway. Especially when I realized he wasn't the only one gone.
Neil was, too. And Hild. And Thomas. And even Bitty, who was new but a nice presence around the bar. Semele's was quiet, I stopped receiving texts from any of my friends, and I suddenly felt so alone for the very first time since I got here. Derek had been there since my very first day in Darrow, and I hadn't realized how much I relied on him being around until he wasn't.
Running out of food for Jinx and Puff is the only reason I head back out there again. I don't remember what sort of food I have to get for Jinx, and I know she'll make me regret if I don't get Her Majesty's exact brand. I even tell her as much, trying to make light conversation because she's been pissed at me ever since I put her in a cat carrier for the trip over. Puff is sitting in a pocket in my jacket, a quiet, warm ball of fuzz against my hip.
I try not to get my hopes up when I reach the front door. Eleven days (since the last time he texted me, anyway) is a long time, and I don't know. Maybe he is gone. Maybe he isn't.
"We're here," I tell Jinx as I set her down, pulling out the spare key I snagged on my way out of the cabin that first day to unlock the door. She ignores me as I move the carrier into the doorway, then unlatch it so she can dart out.
It's been over a week, though, and Derek still hasn't returned. That first day I went over after not hearing from him for a couple days, I sort of broke into his cabin. Sort of. It didn't sound like he was home, but I could hear Jinx crying inside, and that alone freaked me out. I managed to get into the cabin through a window, and it looked like he hadn't been there for a couple of days.
That put a fucking damper on my Halloween, let me tell you.
After three days of returning each evening to feed Jinx and Puff, I finally just brought them back home with me. I hated trekking out there, getting my hopes up along the way, just to have them crushed again. Whenever Derek came back, he could come and get them from me.
That's what I figured, anyway. Especially when I realized he wasn't the only one gone.
Neil was, too. And Hild. And Thomas. And even Bitty, who was new but a nice presence around the bar. Semele's was quiet, I stopped receiving texts from any of my friends, and I suddenly felt so alone for the very first time since I got here. Derek had been there since my very first day in Darrow, and I hadn't realized how much I relied on him being around until he wasn't.
Running out of food for Jinx and Puff is the only reason I head back out there again. I don't remember what sort of food I have to get for Jinx, and I know she'll make me regret if I don't get Her Majesty's exact brand. I even tell her as much, trying to make light conversation because she's been pissed at me ever since I put her in a cat carrier for the trip over. Puff is sitting in a pocket in my jacket, a quiet, warm ball of fuzz against my hip.
I try not to get my hopes up when I reach the front door. Eleven days (since the last time he texted me, anyway) is a long time, and I don't know. Maybe he is gone. Maybe he isn't.
"We're here," I tell Jinx as I set her down, pulling out the spare key I snagged on my way out of the cabin that first day to unlock the door. She ignores me as I move the carrier into the doorway, then unlatch it so she can dart out.